A RACE HARDER TO ENDURE THAN KNOWING THAT YOUR PARENTS HAD SEX, THE 9TH ANNUAL
7 MILE TRAIL RUN READING, PA
SUNDAY, JANUARY 25, 2015 ** 11 A.M.
** NO ENTRY LIMIT
It was recently announced that the Pabst Brewing Company, makers of Pabst Blue Ribbon, has been sold to a Russian company, a clandestine way for the U.S to get back at Russia for all the bad things they have done in the Ukraine. Pabst is the maker of 14 different brands of beer. These include many brews so “nasty” that they could not stay in business when operating on their own; such as Piels, Schlitz, National Bo, Schaefers and Old Milwalkee Light & Not-So-Light. During periods of shortages in the embalming industry, many of these same brands have been used as substitutes for that essential fluid. Pabst’s also produces 40 oz. legends such as Colt 45 and St Ides; drinks that no sane person would EVER be seen downing on the streets without it being covered with a brown paper bag. Many drinking these products also cover THEIR face with a brown paper bag, just in case the bag around their beer breaks instead. The irony of this situation is that with this lineup of swamplike liquids, Pabst Blue Ribbon (not exactly the champagne of bottled beer) appears to be the PREMIUM brand that comes with this acquisition. Amazingly, IT IS! The moral here is that ALL assessments are RELATIVE to their situation. Take the Chilly Cheeks 7M Trail Run. RELATIVELY, it is the HARDEST trail run that Pretzel City Sports holds on a “per mile” basis. It has more hills than any of our races, just as many rocks and roots, bone chilling temperatures as a rule, a crawl up Mt. WhaDaFug II and on-course obstacles covered with snow during certain years (as in 2014) that you ONLY know are there once they cause you to end up face first on the terra firma. But while it is tuff RELATIVE to our other races, is it REALLY that hard; like being in labor for 19 hours, sitting thru a Sarah McLachlan concert or solving a 23 letter Wheel of Fortune puzzle with only 1 vowel showing?? It can’t be all THAT hard since as many as 400-600 people have conquered it each year for the past 8 years. And it can’t be THAT hard when the finishers still have the energy to stay around for hours afterwards to enjoy the free breakfast we provide and frequent our cash bar. It can’t be THAT hard since some people that watch The Biggest Loser and refer to the contestants as “Tiny” have finished this event before the month has elapsed, just by taking their time and persevering. The Chilly Cheeks is a true test of your mid-winter fitness. Bring your RELATIVES as well. Come join us to see if YOU and THEY can finish this race before your cheeks get chilly too; all 4 for them! LEGAL LINGO: You race at your own risk; you alone are responsible for your welfare at all times!! This race has occasionally been held on ice and snow, which makes it easier to find your footprints but harder to find your corpse. So, if dinged, drag your OWN frozen butt back to a spot that we can drive to; to bring you back in. If you get lost (you WON’T), please find the Liederkranz before your scrambled eggs & pancakes get even colder than you are. Since the race is quite tuff, we only let those enter that are 18 or over (16 & 17 yr. olds can too but ONLY if they have a parent at the race). We also turn away people who think that Rosie O’Donnell “is”, “was” or “ever will be” funny and anyone who doesn’t spit or get mumbly-mouthed when they say “Susie sells Sushi & Cinnamon down by the seashore” fast three times.
REGISTRATION/ENTRY: Reading Liederkranz German Singing & Sports Club, 140 Spook Lane (off of Hill Rd), Reading, PA (same place as most Pretzel City events). Reg. opens at 9:45 a.m., we race at 11. Fee is $34 w/ long sleeve tech shirt if postmarked by Wed, Jan 7th. Afterwards, $39 while shirts last (inc. day of race), $30 when gone. NOTE: LONG SLEEVE TECH SHIRT ONLY GUARANTEED FOR ALL THOSE REGISTERING BY THE PRICE BREAK; THOSE REGISTERING AFTER THAT DATE MAY RECEIVE A LONG SLEEVE COTTON SHIRT INSTEAD OR NO SHIRT AT ALL. If you fail to pre-enter, you’ll regret that you have no other reminder of this race other than frostbite, the sniffles, sore quads from the uphills, shin splints from the downhills and a chipped tooth from the frozen water at the aide station. Even if you register in the post-reg period but before raceday, you’re almost surely guaranteed a shirt of your preferred size and type. (optional on-line reg on pretzelcitysports.com will close at Midnight of the Wed before the race) We race in rain, snow or bitter cold; in fact, damn near anything! Call 610-779-2668 after 6 AM the day of the race ONLY if roads are pretty much impassable that day (not just a little “sub-par”). An email will be sent to all entries too, the minute we decide to postpone but if we only have your work email, you're screwed. If postponed, it will be held the following Sunday; same time, same place, better weather. No refunds, no mailed shirts or awards; no pets allowed on site, no outside alcohol allowed on site, no whiners, no wheelchairs (at least on the course) & no people that think that snow on the ground is any reason to cancel a race. ‘Cause we won’t!. Also, bring extra shoes for going inside! ATM on site; works most of the time.
registration not required
but always encouraged!
(small service fee applies, closes at midnight on Wed the week of the race)
YOU GET: Long sleeve Tech shirt with a memorable design, hot breakfast, indoor registration & toilets, free snacks at the finish line, suds/chilled Jaegermeister/strange Germanic meats available for purchase thru the club, WELL marked course, 2 water stops, live band, finish place posted immediately & results on www.pretzelcitysports.com in 1-2 days, unique aide station fare & other surprises not yet finalized. Breakfast tickets can be bought at reg for your peeps!
M & F 1st & 2nd and Top M & F Masters (40 & over) plus:
18-29: 5M, 5F 30-39: 5M, 5F 40-49: 5M, 5F 50-59: 5M, 4F 60-69: 5M, 3F 70+ : 2M, 1F
DIRECTIONS FROM: PHILLY: IMPORTANT: DO NOT USE MAPQUEST DIRECTIONS FROM PHILLY! Instead, take Rt. 422 West from King of Prussia. Just before Reading, at the new TARGET/LOWES/GIANT on your right, bear right onto Bus. Rt. 422, marked “Mt. Penn”; DON’T follow sign to Reading **Go 3 miles until road splits at the CVS. JUST PAST Arners Restaurant, take right onto Glen Rd (sign missing, look for "Stokesay Castle" sign visible at last moment). At end of Glen, turn right and then take your next right just 50 yards ahead. Or follow the signs to Stokesay, the Liederkrantz driveway is right next to it.
YORK/LANCASTER: Rt. 222 N to Reading. Follow it to Rt. 422 East bypass around Reading . Exit at Mt Penn. Take a left, go 3 lights to Bus. Rt. 422. Take a left, follow the Philly directions above after the astrik **.
ALLENTOWN: Take Rt. 222 S, merge onto Rt. 422 East (Reading/Pottstown). Go around Reading and exit at Mt Penn. Go left, go 3 lights to Bus. 422W. Take left, follow Philly directions after asterisks **.
LEBANON: Take Rt. 422 East. Just past Berkshire mall, bear right onto Rt. 422E. Continue on bypass past Reading to Mt Penn exit. Take left, go 3 lights to Bus.422W. Go left, follow Philly directions above after asterisks **.
COAL REGION: Take Rt 61 South onto Rt 222 Bypass, follow same directions above listed in “Allentown”
BALTIMORE: Rt 83 North to Rt 30 East at York to Rt 222N at Lancaster. Follow Lancaster directions above.
GPS/TomTom INPUT: 143 Spook Lane, Reading, PA 19606 or “Spook Lane & Hill Rd” or “Hill Rd & Glen Rd”.
OPTIONAL ONLINE ENTRY AVAILABLE ON WWW.PRETZELCITYSPORTS.COM
(small service fee applies---closes at midnight on the Wed night before raceday)
CLICK HERE TO REGISTER ONLINE NOW
Head Cheek: Ron Horn, firstname.lastname@example.org, www.pretzelcitysports.com or 610-779-2668 (but not during Survivor, CSI-Vegas, Modern Family, Biggest Loser, Amazing Race, Tosh.0 or any Eagles game (inc. post-game commentary))
Print clearly so we know what to put on the tombstone***May be duplicated***Sign waiver
First name _______________________Last name ____________________________________________
City __________________________ State _____ Zip_______ Sex: M F
Race day age: Date of birth / / (must be 18 or more)
Long Sleeve Tech Shirt Size: XS S M L XL 2X (circle one)
Phone: ( __ ) ________________ A.M. or P.M. (circle one or both)
Email:_______________@_________________________ Already Get Run UpdateEmails? ____ Yes ____ No
if used on regular basis--include a readable address
WAIVER: I know that running a trail race is a potentially hazardous activity. I should not enter and run unless I am medically able and properly trained. I also know that there will be traffic, hazards, debris and poor footing on the course and assume the risk for running on it. I also assume any or all other risks associated with running or attending the race including but not limited to falls, contact with other participants, the affects of the weather, getting lost, wildlife & insect attacks and all such risks being known and appreciated by me. Knowing these facts, and in consideration of your accepting my entry fee, I hereby for myself, my heirs, executors, administrators or anyone else who might claim on my behalf, covenant not to sue, and waive, release and discharge Pretzel City Sports, all municipalities in which the event is held, the race director, course officials, all other organizations directly or indirectly associated with the race, any and all sponsors including their agents, employees, assigns or anyone acting for on their behalf, or anyone else associated in any way with the race, from any or all claims or liability for death, personal injury or property damage of any kind of nature what so ever arising out of, or in the course of, my participation in this event(s). This waiver extends to all claims of every kind or nature what so ever, foreseen or unforeseen, known or unknown. By entering this race, I am granting permission to Pretzel City Sports to use any pictures or likenesses of me secured at the event in any way they see fit without review, restriction or compensation. BY SIGNING THIS, I ATTEST THAT I HAVE READ AND UNDERSTAND THIS WAIVER :
Signature _____________________________________________________ date ____ / ____ /20____
Insurance Provided by Road Runner Clubs of America (R.R.C.A.)