PRETZEL CITY SPORTS’S 13TH YEAR OF “DASHING AWAY THE DRUMSTICK DAMAGE”; THE
15K Trail Run
Sunday, Nov 27, 2016 10:00 AM No Entry Limit!!
French Creek State Park, Birdsboro, PA
There may have been times in life when you have been referred to as a “turkey”, as if it was a derogatory term.??!! Like when your “beloved” first brought you home to meet Mom and Pop and Dad later asked “where the heck did she find THIS turkey??” Or your neighbor lamented that she was developing a “turkey deck” just like yours. Or someone at work inappropriately stated that a pregnant co-worker looked like she was “stuffed like a turkey”. WHY people have chosen to use this term as anything less than “high praise” is beyond us!! Ben Franklin proposed that the turkey be our national symbol. Dang, THAT is pretty high praise, even though the bifocal-ed patriot wasn’t important enough to warrant a role in the hit show “Hamilton”. A “turkey” in bowling means you threw 3 strikes in a row; pretty darn GOOD! “Wild Turkey” is a top-shelf bourbon and turkey meat has lots of protein, is low in fat and has very few calories unless you deep fry it or lather it in gravy or mayo. Yes, being called a “turkey” is like being called a “superstar”, an “overachiever” or “the least heavy person in your Weight Watcher class”. That’s why you should be PROUD to be one of the “turkeys” that do the 2016 Dirty Bird 15k Trail Run. This race takes place just 3 days after you alone eat 7 pounds of turkey and then turkey and waffles, turkey salad, turkey tacos, turkey sausage, etc for the next 2 days. The Dirty Bird is your chance to burn all that off! After a short road section to stretch out the field, you’ll enter a slightly rolling course; not "Kansas" flat but not like Nepal either. 85% of the course is on rocky trails, 12% is on dirt road and 3% is on paved road. So, you have plenty of places to pass slower runners and also plenty of places where you can tuck into a rumba line akin to dancing “Hot, Hot, Hot” at your Aunt Mildred’s 4th wedding. It is a moderately difficult trail run with only really 3 hills (nicely spaced) and long sections where you can REALLY open it up. Yes, it has rocks and roots, uneven surfaces and branches under which you have to duck. But if it DIDN’T, we’d be calling it a ROAD run. And who needs another one of THEM??!! Join the other “turkeys” to race in whatever conditions God conjures up that day! LEGAL “DRESSING”: YOU RACE AT YOUR OWN RISK & YOU ARE SOLEY RESPONSIBLE FOR GETTING YOUR BUNS OUT OF THE WOODS! We’re runners too! Thus, our spindly arms are too weak to carry you out of the woods if you get hurt, so if you break a wishbone, beg other runners to drag your carcass to an aide station. Also, we don’t look for people that get lost that day so we can get to Sunday evening church (you buy that?) but you won’t get lost; the Blind Boys of Alabama singing group could follow this course. PLEASE NOTE: Since this is a medium-tuff race, we’ll allow 16 & 17 year olds to enter too IF they have a parent/legal guardian with them at the race. No exceptions; the medics can’t work on under 18’s without permission (not that they’ll have to, kids are all made of rubber!) Entry is also closed to anyone wearing an “Elmer Fudd” hats lest they be confused for hunters and anyone who plans to play “Pokémon Go” while running this course. GET A LIFE!
GOODIES: Instant results, registration in enclosed tent, results on www.pretzelcitysports.com the next business day, modern johns (no showers), WELL marked course if no one screws with it, lots of parking, 3 water stops, hot & cold grub, course viewable at several points via car, bike or snowmobile, camping/cabins in park (brrr!!! 610 582-9680) Playground right next to registration, pool will be drained by then, much like you from doing the race.
ENTRY: We race at 10 A.M.; reg opens at 8:45. $34 if postmarked by Sat, 11/12, with long sleeve shirt, $39 after cutoff & day of race while shirts last; $32 when gone. FEW “EXTRA” SHIRTS PRINTED over our entry total at the cutoff! Our shirt designs tend to be “memorable” (not like the time you saw your Grandparent naked by accident, the NICE kind of memorable) and they're great conversation starters at biker bars, real estate flipping seminars, speed dating sessions and tractor pulls. So pre-enter so you get a shirt, even if the cutoff has passed (mail it in or go to pretzelcitysports.com till midnight on the Wed before raceday) since remaining shirts are awarded on a “first entered, first gets” basis!! We race in ANY & ALL weather; no refunds, no mailed shirts/awards, no racing w/pets unless you stay in last for the 1st mile, no alcohol in park & no entries from weenies and wimps.
IMPORTANT NOTE # 1: While Pretzel City REJOICES in running in highly “interesting” weather, things may get so bad that the Park stops us from having the race that day; roads closed by state, a boy scout hold up in a cave with an AK47, a deer shedding her pelt on course for bucks, etc. DON”T confuse “bad” conditions with “normal” snowfall (before or during the event), shrinkage-causing temps, slow but still drive-able roads, etc.; we race in ALL of those cases!!! Race to be postponed ONLY in extreme cases. In this HIGHLY UNLIKELY case, a message will be put both on the home page of www.pretzelcitysports under "breaking news" and on 610-779-2668 the second that we know & we’ll send out an email immediately but that may not help if I only have your work email. Our regrets in advance to anyone that gets “burnt” from driving in the night before but PCS won’t “control” this; the Park will. IF POSTPONED, NEW DATE FOR THE RACE WILL BE THE FOLLOWING SAT! If postponed that day, we’ll find ANOTHER day and contact all prereg folks; that’s why readable phone #'s and email addresses on your reg form ARE ESSENTIAL! But the probability that we postpone it is about as low as the probability of any major Philadelphia Sports winning a championship in the next decade, to our utter disappointment!
IMPORTANT NOTE # 2: PCS shares the Park staff’s desire to limit the impact of any race on its trails. If the trail & weather that weekend require us to do so, we reserve the right to adjust the course, its distance and/or its “percent of trails vs. dirt & hard road” to insure that the trails will not be damaged.
AWARDS: 1st & 2ndM/F +: 0-29: 4M, 4F 30-39: 4M, 4F 40-49: 4M, 4F 50-59: 4M, 4F 60-67: 4M, 3F 68+: 2M, 2F
Directions: Take Rt. 422 East of Reading about 6 miles. Take Rt. 345 South to 2nd light in Birdsboro; left on Rt. 724 East. About 1 mile; go right onto Rt. 345 South. Park is 5 miles ahead on right. Reg is behind main office.
Alt. Way from both East & West: Take PA Turnpike Morgantown exit, go east on Rt 23 until 345 North, take 345N to 1st Park road. Enter & go to T, go right, then go right again to registration area behind main office.
Another Alt. Way from East: Rt 422 to Rt 100 S at Pottstown, take first exit and go right onto Rt 724 West, Go approx 6 miles to Rt 345, take left. Park is 5 miles ahead on your right. Reg is behind the main office.
OPTIONAL ONLINE ENTRY AVAILABLE ON WWW.PRETZELCITYSPORTS.COM
(small service fee applies---closes at midnight on the Wed night before raceday)
CLICK HERE TO REGISTER ONLINE NOW
Check Payable to & Mailed to (with waiver): PRETZEL CITY SPORTS, 112 W. 36TH ST., READING, PA 19606 Biggest Turkey: Ron Horn, email@example.com, 610-779-2668 (AM or PM), www.pretzelcitysports.com
Print Your Dirty Bird info as clearly as your list to the North Pole Sign Back of Waiver Form
May be Duplicated
Last Name_________________________________ First Name _________________________________
City ____________________________________ State______ Zip_________ Sex: M F Race Day Age _____
(must be 18 or older to run, 16 & 17 yr olds allowed with parent present )
Date of Birth___/___/___ Tel: (______)________________________________________ A.M. or P.M?_____
Long Sleeve T-shirt Size (circle one): XS S M L XL 2X
(regular long sleeve shirts may only be available for late entries, very late entries may get no shirt at all)
(if checked fairly regularly-print clearly!!!)
Already Getting Runner Update Emails on Regular Basis? (check one) ________ Yes _________No
WAIVER: I know that running a trail run
is a potentially hazardous activity. I should not enter or
run unless I am medically able & properly trained. I also
know that there will be traffic, winter hazards, debris, and
poor footing on the course and assume the risk for running
on it. I also assume any or all other risks associated with
running or attending the race including but not limited to
falls, contact with other participants, the affects of the
weather, the conditions of the roads and getting lost, all
such risks being known and appreciated by me. Knowing these
facts, and in consideration of your accepting my entry fee,
I hereby for myself, my heirs, executors, administrators or
anyone else who might claim on my behalf, covenant not to
sue, and waive, release and discharge Pretzel City Sports,
French Creek State Park, PA Dept of Conservation & Natural
Resources all municipalities in which the event is held, the
race committee, volunteers, all other organizations directly
or indirectly associated with the race, any or all sponsors
including their agents, employees, assigns or anyone acting
on their behalf, or anyone else associated in any way with
this race, from any or all claims or liability for death,
personal injury or property damage of any kind or nature whatsoever
arising out of , or in the course of, my participation in
this event. This waiver extends to all claims of every kind
or nature whatsoever; foreseen or unforeseen, known or unknown.
By entering this race, I am granting permission to Pretzel
City Sports to use any pictures or likenesses of me secured
at the event in any way they see fit without review, restriction
or compensation. I HAVE READ & UNDERSTAND THIS WAIVER:
Insurance Provided by Road Runner Clubs of America