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THE PAGODA PACERS A.C.,
READING, PA PRESENTS THE GREATEST COMBINATION OF ATHLETICS & SILLINESS
SINCE THE ADVENT OF DWARF THROWING CONTESTS AT BARS;
THE 15TH ANNUAL
MT. PENN MUDFEST
15k Trail Run, Sat, April 11, 2009 (day before Easter)
10 AM-Reading, PA-Limited to First 825 Entries
“ONE OF THE FIVE U.S. TRAIL RACES YOU MUST
DO”- Nov/2000 Issue:Runner’s World
“ONE OF THE TOP 21 TRAILS RACES IN THE U.S.”-
Oct/1998 Issue: Runner’s World
“ONE OF THE TOP 6 TRAIL RACES IN THE U.S."-
Fall/1998 Issue: Men’s Journal
“A TREMENDOUS BOON TO
SOCIETY"- Nov 13th/2007 Issue: Torn Meniscus Weekly
A Pagoda Pacer
Event- entry thru www.pretzelcitysports.com ONLY
No Race Day Entry/No
Waiting List/No Bribery (unless
it cannot be traced-small, unmarked bills preferred)
Race Held in Memory of Fellow Pacer & Race
Co-Director Bill Bradley
To this day, Oprah Winfrey
continues to try to remain smaller than Rhode Island with varying & very
public results. She strapped on the Nikes a few years ago, did a 4:29 marathon
and you'd have thought that she won the Olympics; the Runners World issue with
her on the cover remains their best selling issue of all time. Later, as her
love handles became more like love pontoons, she tried pumping more pressurized
water up her tookas than the Chicago Fire Dept. uses in a week. Alas, your
colon being "clean" does not always lead to "lean and mean"
but it does make for great rhyme or limerick possibilities about the attempt (there
once was a talk show queen, who decided, her colon, to clean…... ). 3-4 years
ago, she hired a personal chef who later penned a best selling cook book about
the meals he made to keep her weight in check. Having not heard from him in
several years & seeing her pack on the inches once more, there is
speculation that she ate him instead. And yet, despite the knowledge that her failures
will be well documents in the public forum, she gamely continues trying to
reach "posterior perfection", while leading us all to that same state
of nirvana as well.
The Mt Penn Mudfest has never
had to take such radical steps; it is "perfect" already. That's why
it has "filled" the past 10 yrs., often in only several weeks, and
why it remains the 3rd most popular rustic trail run in the U. S. & the
largest one East of the Rockies. It is a mix of athletic challenge &
absurdity that is unmatched by anything other than Full Contact Backgammon. It
has downed logs, downed runners & places where you down refreshments that
you don’t normally find at races other than NASCAR. Its rocks will make your
toes tingle, its 4 early-Spring water crossings will make the hair stand up on
the back of your neck so far that you'll think that someone spiked your styling
gel with Viagra and its long downhills & uphills will have you staring at
your feet more than the weird "loner" down the hall in Apt 4B. But
LOTS of races have physical challenges; why does this one annually draw people
from 20-25 states? Well, maybe it’s the pig themed awards, pig-adorned shirts,
unique & possibly illegal aid stations, a Clydesdale category unlike any
other, in-race events such as the “raw egg carry” and the "Easter Egg
Hunt" and the appearance of the oldest cocktail lounge act in the U.S. All
these things cause hundreds to flock annually to a town with no passenger
service via air, rail or stagecoach. All and all, the Mt Penn Mudfest is like
the day that your robe came open while you were using the paper shredder or the
party where your new boyfriend showed your Mom the tattoo on his left buttcheek.
Of you! Legal B. S.: YOU RACE AT YOUR OWN RISK, you alone are responsible for
your well being while here! We do
not look for missing runners; finding them on this course is like trying to eat
gummy worms with no teeth. We will have medical folks on site but they are
"old school" EMS's who believe that any successful recovery from
anything starts with a good enema. Since the race can be challenging to some,
it is closed to 1) runners below 18 (can be 16 or 17 IF a parent or guardian is
present-no proof that they're present and it’s “Sayonara, Sucker!” 2) anyone who
needs a ShamWow to towel off with after running 300 ft. and 3) anyone who
thinks that Philadelphia Eagles Coach Andy Reid can coach, draft well or look
slimmer in black.
WALKERS-PLEASE NOTE: While we respect the desire of “walkers” to see the
course, we can’t ask our folks to stay at their posts for 30-40 extra minutes
for the benefit of only 2-3. Entrants should be able to run at least half the
course, at worst, & those exclusively “walking” at the 7 mile point will be
asked to stop racing (7 mile pt is 40 ft from the finish)
Awards: Much-sought-after pig adorned awards to
overall M/F 1st thru 3rd and Masters M/F winners plus:
18-29: 7M, 5F 30-39: 7M, 5F 40-49: 7M, 5F
50-59: 7M, 4F 60& over: 5M, 3F 70+: 2M, 1 F
Also, Both Open
Clydesdales/Clydettes & Master Clydesdales/Clydettes (40 & over) Awards: 1-5th Male & 1-3rd Female in both (not
eligible for age group awards). Men: your weight (in lbs.) divided by your
height (in inches) must be at least 2.7 lbs./inch. Women: same formula but
your “min” is 2.15 lbs./inch. This method stops the "buff but big's"
from taking these awards from the more deserving "buffaloes". Sign
up is on race day, scale on site to both confirm eligibility & embarrass.
Registration/Packet
Pickup: Race starts at 10 A.M at Rotary Park, List Rd., just off Angora Rd.
(near the Pagoda) in Reading; all packet pickup occurs that morning and pickup opens at 8:30. NO RACE DAY ENTRY! NO WAITING LIST! MUST REGISTER
ONLINE AT WWW.PRETZELCITYSPORTS.COM ; OPENS JAN 1, 2009 & CLOSES WHEN WE REACH 825 RUNNERS OR BY MIDNIGHT,
APRIL 8TH, WHICHEVER OCCURS FIRST. If you have never been on the Internet and don’t know
anyone who has access to the Internet or still think that the
"Internet" is a new gastric bypass "screen" that stops fat
in your gut from reaching your thighs, call Ron Horn at 610-779-2668 for an
alternate way to sign up.
Fee: $33 if entered by midnight, 3/25/09,
$38 after that until midnight 4/8/09 or when we hit 825 entries; whichever
happens first. Full refund of entry fee (but not service charge) if canceling
by 4/1/09 (NO FOOLING!), no refund after that date. Any substitution you
arrange is ok until 4/1 PROVIDING THAT YOU NOTIFY THE RACE DIRECTOR OF THE NEW
PERSON'S COMPLETE INFO BY 4/1 AS WELL; ($$$ exchanged is between you & the
sub you find and they may be stuck with your shirt “size” & “type”). NO
RACE DAY SUBBING-IT SCREWS UP OUR RESULTS! Staff may ask for ID to stop day-of
substitutions. Changes or requests for refunds after above cutoffs will be
ignore much like Sarah Palin's claim that she can see Russia from her house. No
“carry overs” to following year, has become too difficult to track.
Your Goodies? NEW FOR 2009-TECH SHIRTS! No ads on shirt, just the famous “running pig” logo,
finisher awards for all, snack bar, hot & cold food, 4 water stops, medical
help on site, nearby parking, on-trail surprises, results on pagodapacers.com
about 2-3 days after race & a course where your friends can tell you how
bad you look twice without leaving the assembly area (4 times if we count the
start & finish)(sorry, no showers). Race is “on” in any kind of weather; NO MAILED SHIRTS OR AWARDS!! NOTE: Rotary Park strictly forbids alcohol, pets, bikes and bratty little kids. If you must bring them, please have a tight leash around their necks and muzzle them if needed,
especially the kids. And if the Rotary folks ask you to put them back in the
car, please comply without any objection, lest we lose this site for future
Mudfests.
Directions: FROM
PHILLY: DO NOT USE ANY DIRECTIONS THAT INCLUDE THE
TURNPIKE, THAT WAY IS LONGER AND WILL NOT WORK WITH THE FOLLOWING TURNS. Go to King of Prussia,
take 202 S & pick up Rt 422 W from the onramp toward Pottstown; take it the
whole way to Reading . One block past
Arbys/Burger King, bear right onto Bus Rt. 422W (Mt Penn). **Go 2-3 miles until you pass a Bank, a Subway &
then Arners Restaurant. JUST PAST ARNERS, go right onto Glen Rd (road
sign missing, is right before start of bridge). When Glen ends, left onto Hill
Rd. Take a right past the Park on the right (home of many Pretzel City events)
onto Angora Rd. Stay on Angora (stay to right at all time) until your 1st 4-way intersect: List Rd. Go right on List, take 2nd gate on right (Rotary
Field; sign is on left).
FROM LANCASTER: Take Rt. 222 N. to Reading, **After passing Mall on
left, bear right onto Rt. 422 East toward Pottstown (is also Rt. 222S). Stay
on Rt. 422E past Lancaster Ave exit and Rt. 176 South exit until the Mt Penn
Exit. Take the exit, go left at the top of ramp. Go to the 3rd light, take
left onto Bus Rt. 422W and follow Philly instructs above after the **.
FROM ALLENTOWN: Bus. Rt. 222 S toward Reading (DON’T take new
Reading bypass) Go 2 miles thru shopping areas. 200 yards past Pizza Hut
& a Loews, go left onto Rt 12 (old Rdg Bypass). Take 2nd exit; Spring
Valley Rd. Go right at end of exit. Take 2nd left (past Crab Barn) up
Reading’s unique McKnights Gap Rd. Go straight thru stop sign at top to next
stop sign 25 yds ahead. Take left and then an immediate hard right up Skyline
Dr. Take 1st left on that hill onto List Rd. At next intersect
(List & Angola), go straight across; Rotary Park is 2nd gate on right,
(sign is on the left).
FROM LEBANON OR
COAL REGION: Leb: Take 422 east and follow Lancaster directions above
after ** Coal Region: take Rt 61S
or Rt 183S to Rt 222S, take RT 222S to 422E, follow Lancaster directions above
after **.
FROM GEORGIA, N.C,
VIR., ETC: Go north, bear right. FROM
VT, NH, MASS, CONN, ETC: Go south,
bear right.
MAPQUEST: Use
intersection of Angora and List Rds. GPS-AHOLICS: do NOT email us for
a street address; it's a baseball field, for God's sake!!!
Questions? Comments? Depressed? Contact Head
Hog Ron Horn at rhornpcs@aol.com or at 610-779-2668
App also
viewable on www.pagodapacers.com and
www.pretzelcitysports.com
Insurance
Provided By Road Runner Clubs of America
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